Spoilers
by Duria Blue
Summary: ONE-SHOT Set during 'Silence in the Library' and 'Forest of the Dead', these are River's thoughts and her in-between moment with the Doctor.


Spoilers

He hadn't recognized him. The Doctor hadn't recognized her. Which hurt her very much. She had known him for _so_ long. But he didn't. The Doctor, _this_ incarnation of the Doctor, told her to go away.

She met him at the Library. She was on a mission with her crew. But she didn't know _he_ would be there. She'd seen pictures of him, yeah, but didn't have the decency of getting to know _him._

The last time she saw him, he was in his fourteenth incarnation. He was fine. Twenty-four years together was rather fantastic, actually. He was such a gentleman. But, frankly, he was a bit _rusty_.

His eleventh incarnation was pretty childish and did the most _stupidest_ things. But that was the first incarnation she met so, with all honesty, she fell in love with _him_.

This incarnation, though, was in fact rather _pretty_ , for the lack of a better word. She even said it to him without hesitation. Which he failed to recognize that it was directed at him. His companion had to tell him. _And,_ this Doctor was _young_. He hasn't experienced the adventures they would have, their embraces, or their kisses…

It hurt her that he didn't know who she was or who she would be in his life. She was her husband, for God's sake! But he didn't know that.

She carried on with her adventure with him. They were in the Library and dealing with Vashta Nerada. It was pretty much a life threatening situation. But the Doctor would hatch a plan and save them. He always did.

.

His companion was gone and he was getting emotional. Too emotional for the matter at hand. She scolded him for that. She didn't do it for her sake. She did it for his. His emotions would get the best of him and he wouldn't be able to think straight. And when he didn't think straight, he could do the most horrible things ever.

.

She could tell that she was getting on his nerves. So she did what she could. She whispered his name. His true name. That shut him up.

Time was running out, though. They had already lost friends, which was not a good thing.

.

Maybe she should explain how she met him. Maybe he could then understand who she is. _Maybe_ he can love her. Why should he love her? The Doctor doesn't just fall in love at randomly. He can't fall in love. Falling in love is not an emotion he would be able to handle because he would tear himself apart from the mere feeling of 'true love'.

The solution isn't telling him; the solution is that he should figure it out himself. If she told him, spoilers, right?

.

He was going to _kill_ himself for the sake of bringing back four thousand twenty-two lives.

He can't do that. If he dies, and doesn't regenerate, she would have never met him. She would have never _loved him_.

' _Easy! I'll hook myself up to the computer. She can borrow my memory space.'_

' _Difficult. It'll kill you stone dead.'_

.

He told her to go with the others, while he was going to connect himself to the database. She couldn't let him do that! So she left Lux in charge and went back to the Doctor.

' _I told you to go!'_

' _Lux can manage without me, but you can't.'_

She punched him square in the jaw.

.

"Sometimes, Doctor, I really do think you are annoying." She moved across the room, observing all the wires. "You're going to wake up soon… and try something stupid." She fished out a pair of handcuffs from her bag. She then proceeded to take everything that was in there. Her diary and her sonic screwdriver.

She walked over to the unconscious Doctor's body and tossed his sonic screwdriver aside. She sat him up and took his wrist into one of the cuffs. She put the other cuff onto a brass pipe.

"You know, this could have had such a _better_ use. And maybe a bit more pleasing." She cooed. She studied him. His head was to the side and his body was a bit hunched over. She crouched in front of him and caressed his cheek.

"You were different in the future. You were happy to see me. Even if you didn't love me. We had many adventures together. We laughed. We cried. I hated you and you said that I didn't. And you were right…" She wiped off a tear with the back of her hand. "I'm not supposed to cry… But I think I'll cry some more when I connect myself to that database." She motioned her head to the wires.

She looked at the Doctor's sleeping face. His features were calm and peaceful. Like he didn't have the universe over his shoulders.

She smiled warmly as she continued to stroke his cheek.

.

' _Time can be rewritten!'_

' _Not those times. Not one line. Don't you dare."_

 _He looked at her with so many emotions. Fear, sadness, but mostly guilt._

' _It's okay. It's okay.' She soothed, trying to hold back tears. 'It's not over for you. You'll see me again. You've got all of that to come. You and me, time and space. You watch us run.'_

' _River, you know my name.' He said desperately._

 _The computer signaled the end._

' _You whispered my name in my ear.'_

' _9, 8, 7…'_

' _There's only one reason I would ever tell my name.' He tried desperately to reach her. 'There's only one time I could.'_

' _Hush, now,' she cooed._

'… _4, 3…'_

' _Spoilers,' she said softly, tears strolling down her cheeks._

.

"Everybody knows that everybody dies, and nobody knows it like the Doctor."


End file.
